i want to take my clothes off in front of you
then my skin too
toss it aside rumpled & empty
i want to lay what i reveal in front of you
& have you love it
because it's me
& you find a way to love me

you told me to worry about people like me
so i worried about myself
you told me to fear people like me
so i feared what i might become
you told me to hate people like me
so i cut myself in half like a pig on the killing floor

i dug my hands in ripping nerve & tissue looking for that one piece my tearing fingers could extirpate that would make me whole

i found it
& it was not what you wanted it to be
it was everything you told me

here i am
every child i've ever been is layered around me like snake skins i never shed
help me take them off like you’re touching my cheek for the first time
tell me you aren’t going anywhere
tell me i’m okay
tell me you love me even more now
with no buttons, no zipper to secure myself back inside
i’ll never wear myself the same with you

thepword is a collection of 220 articles, blogs and podcasts in the voices of pedophiles who oppose adult child sexual contact and exploitation. Our content is frequently removed from mainstream social media or blog sites because of what we are and the fact we talk about it. Our side of the conversation continues here.

other relevant content

those other pedophiles

the suffering of the non-pedophilic non-offender

do you believe in telepathy?

ethan edwards

This blog is called "Celibate Pedophiles". The core message is that many pedophiles never engage in any illegal activity. But then there are the other pedophiles, the ones who are not celibate.

ethan edwards

I usually write about pedophilia. But in the title of this post I use the phrase "non-pedophilic non-offender". Haven't I just described "ordinary people"?

ethan edwards

I feel so terrible. I have this video of a guy being followed by a sheep across a field.

other relevant content

This blog is called "Celibate Pedophiles". The core message is that many pedophiles never engage in any illegal activity. But then there are the other pedophiles, the ones who are not celibate.

I usually write about pedophilia. But in the title of this post I use the phrase "non-pedophilic non-offender". Haven't I just described "ordinary people"?

I feel so terrible. I have this video of a guy being followed by a sheep across a field.