Mandated reporting laws vary among the US states, but this is a common situation: If a girl of 14 goes to a therapist and reports that some cousin (during a rare visit) sexually abused her, the therapist is required by law to report this to the authorities, who will conduct an investigation. The girl...

Ethan Edwards is the co-founder of Virtuous Pedophiles. Blog posts reflect his personal views, and are not statements from the organization.

Mandated reporting laws vary among the US states, but this is a common situation: If a girl of 14 goes to a therapist and reports that some cousin (during a rare visit) sexually abused her, the therapist is required by law to report this to the authorities, who will conduct an investigation. The girl and her family will be interrogated at length. They are innocent parties, but they do not have the option of being left alone.In contrast, if woman of 30 goes to a therapist and speaks of a rape that happened when she was 28, she is in control of the situation. The therapist would be committing a grave breach of professional ethics to tell police about this without the woman's permission.

There are arguments to be made for and against an adult victim deciding to make a report. If she reports it, she is likely to be subjected to intense questioning on a painful subject to determine if she is telling the truth. If there isn't a strong legal case, the rapist will remain at large and she will have gone through an unpleasant process for nothing. If she doesn't report it, she gets to maintain her privacy but perhaps feels some guilt that she is doing nothing to protect some other woman from her same fate. But a vital point is that the choice is hers. Her rape was against her will, but she at least retains the power to decide whom to reveal it to.

If the girl is underage, the rules are different. Society has a strong interest in stopping child sex abuse, but in its zeal it often inflicts another kind of abuse on the child. She is stripped of any choice. She cannot keep this matter private any more. She may have great difficulty obtaining an attorney who works for her interests alone. The younger a child, the greater the role parents should play. But parents do not have the option of huddling with their daughter and affirming her decision to keep the matter private either. Law enforcement decides whether to interrogate and investigate.

Sexual activity with anyone underage is a crime, but some young teens participate enthusiastically, some consent with ambivalence, and some are of course forced into sex. Any spot along this continuum is possible. A grown woman who knows she consented but regrets what happened can discuss this non-crime with a therapist at length. A minor has no such option. It is both a crime and a mandated reporting crime.

Many minors who understand these consequences and want to maintain their privacy have absolutely no one they can turn to — no teacher or coach or therapist. Maybe they could get away with telling a priest if they are involved with a church, or if they are sophisticated enough, maybe they could tell a lawyer, though this is not a profession known for helping people resolve their feelings. If their parents are understanding, perhaps they could tell their parents. But parents may not be understanding, or they may be part of the family dynamic that allowed the abuse to happen in the first place.

Adult women would be justifiably outraged if they were denied the right to discuss rape with therapists in confidence. Why is it OK to deny this same right to minors?

About the author: Ethan Edwards is a pseudonym. I am a pedophile, always celibate, and I have never seen child pornography. My attraction is strongest to girls around 4 years old, but I am also attracted to girls and women up through their 30s or beyond. Now in my late 60s, I'm divorced and living alone. I was married for over 10 years and was heavily involved with raising my 3 daughters. For most of my career I was a successful software engineer. I am very unusual for a pedophile in that I didn't realize that I was one until I was in my 50s—but it was there all along. I am angry that we all must remain silent or risk losing everything. That was my mindset when I co-founded Virtuous Pedophiles in 2012. I soon learned of the the terror of the typical pedophile who realizes as a teenager that his attraction isn't going to go away, who has nowhere to turn for help. The injustice I am most passionate about is the harsh legal penalties imposed on pedophiles who passively view illegal images of children. I stepped down from my role as a director of Virtuous Pedophiles early in 2024 and am delighted to pass the mantle on to a younger generation. This content was taken from Ethan's longstanding blog, Celibate Pedophiles. Some of the titles and taglines have been edited for their inclusion at thepword.

You can see an earlier version of the blog at the wayback machine.

This content was removed from blogspot in 2020 because the platform banned the author's account, giving only a vague reason.

the p word is a collection of 321 articles, blogs, podcasts and threads in the voices of pedophiles and others who oppose adult child sexual contact and sexual exploitation of children. Despite our mainstream views, this content is frequently removed from social media or blog sites because openly discussing pedophile attractions or avowing them are not tolerated. Our side of the conversation continues here.

editor at the p word net | Except where stated, all images are AI and do not depict real people. | Download the whole site.

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