what sorts of child sexuality are ok?

what sorts of child sexuality are ok?

20 April 2015    
from celibate pedophiles

ethan edwards 

 

If you believe that all sex outside of a heterosexual marriage is a sin, then you have ample reason to think adult-child sex is wrong without needing to look at details (assuming we rule out the case of child marriage). Much of what I write will not seem relevant to you.

Ethan Edwards is the co-founder of Virtuous Pedophiles. Blog posts reflect his personal views, and are not statements from the organization.

 

If you believe that all sex outside of a heterosexual marriage is a sin, then you have ample reason to think adult-child sex is wrong without needing to look at details (assuming we rule out the case of child marriage). Much of what I write will not seem relevant to you.Instead, I start from the perspective that any sexual activity between or among consenting adults in private should be legal. It also does not warrant any sort of moral condemnation. In fact, much of it should be actively celebrated as the expression of a joyful sexual desire in the ways that appeal to the individuals involved. It is part of the good life.

So what about children?

Many children masturbate from a young age. Parents are often aware of this around ages 2-5, after the child has the coordination to explore systematically and before they decide to be private about it. Many children engage in games of doctor — often just showing each other their genitals, maybe occasional touching, but rarely for purposes of sexual pleasure. I think this is all healthy, and so do child development experts.

Once children start puberty, they begin to think about sex a lot. They typically masturbate more often and care about it more. They are fascinated by the gender they are attracted to and fantasize about them sexually. They flirt, "hang out", date and sometimes form intense emotional bonds. Some kiss, make out, have oral sex, and have intercourse. Anyone who thinks these all appear at the age of 16 or 18 is out of touch with reality. They happen much sooner for a great many young teens. A great many who don't do such things with partners wish they could.

I feel clear that none of this is abnormal, and certainly none of it should be of interest to the criminal justice system if it is consensual. I would strongly urge young teens to take reliable measures to avoid STIs and pregnancy. I would advise girls below the age of 16 or so to refrain from intercourse. But that is not a matter of the immorality of sex or the desire to have sex — it is practical advice based on my best judgment of what will make someone happy in the long run.

I believe that childhood sexual interest is natural, and believe that children should generally be free to do as they please unless there is a good reason to restrict them.

With all that in place, the question naturally arises whether some children might want to have sex with adults. I think some young teens often will feel healthy desires in that direction — a classic case is the young teen girl with a young man. I do not believe that any children who choose to engage in sexual activity with (willing!) adults should be subject to criminal penalties — only the adults should be at risk.

Pro-contact pedophiles sometimes paint all anti-contact people as prudish and fundamentally opposed to all sex and sexuality. I am not.

Yet I still believe that adult-child sex is wrong, and that adults (usually men) who engage in sexual activity with children should nonetheless face criminal penalties. I do not want society to change to make this sexual activity acceptable. Stay tuned.



This content was taken from Ethan's longstanding blog, Celibate Pedophiles. Some of the titles and taglines have been edited for their inclusion at thepword.

You can see an earlier version of the blog at the wayback machine.

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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ethan edwards

Research on pedophiles has suggested that we differ from ordinary peoplein a variety of non-flattering ways . The implications of being short or left-handed are obvious and not very serious for a person's self-concept. But IQ is more central to a person's self-worth, and the claimed deficit bothers...

 

bly

Is there a difference between being attracted to a child and wanting to be a child? Yes. But there is also overlap.

 

ethan edwards

There is space for children to not be victimized, but there is no space for pedophiles to think that gives them the right to do sexual things with kids that they perceive to be willing.

 
 
 
the iq deficit of pedo abusers may not transfer to the celibate
ethan edwards

Research on pedophiles has suggested that we differ from ordinary peoplein a variety of non-flattering ways . The implications of being short or left-handed are obvious and not very serious for a person's self-concept. But IQ is more central to a person's self-worth, and the claimed deficit bothers...

 
 
 
thread: autopedophilia and pedophilia
bly

Is there a difference between being attracted to a child and wanting to be a child? Yes. But there is also overlap.

 
 
 
review of "pedal" by chelsea rooney
ethan edwards

There is space for children to not be victimized, but there is no space for pedophiles to think that gives them the right to do sexual things with kids that they perceive to be willing.